Isabel B. Kirk, MA

Isabel Kirk is a bilingual mental health counselor psychotherapist offering individual and group services in the Washington DC metropolitan area and distance counseling (online and phone).

For her complete profile, visit: Isabel Kirk

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    Patience? Easier said that put into practice

    patiencePatience is a virtue. With that four word sentence being said, you cannot imagine how difficult it is for many individuals to follow that virtue. Patience comes from the Latin word pati which means to suffer, to endure, to bear. It is the ability to tolerate waiting, delay, or frustration without becoming agitated or upset. It’s the ability to be able to control your emotions or impulses and proceed calmly when faced with difficulties. It may appear to be passive; however it is an active, purposeful and necessary form of self-discipline. Yes! the matter of waiting for things to come to you, is something that can and needs to be cultivated.

    Without patience many of our actions would be counter-productive and ultimately much time and energy would be wasted spinning our wheels. Surely, patience is a time-tested virtue. There are many things in life that require patience, some are big like becoming a doctor or a mother but most of them are just daily simple accomplishments such as waiting in line or dealing with a DMV errand. If you want to learn how to cultivate this virtue I recommend you continue reading. Life will be better.

    Keep your eyes open. If you are usually impatient about the same type of things you might be able to discover patterns. Which events, people, phrases or circumstances always seem to make you lose your cool? Sit down and make a list of all the things which cause you anxiety, tension, or frustration. Try to avoid or change the ones that you can, and of course, let go of the things that you can’t change. Easier said than done, but unfortunately you only have those two choices: empower yourself and do something about it or let it go.

    Be mindful and live in the moment. When you are doing something focus on that and only that. Many times we get impatient because we are thinking about all the other things that we need to fit in our schedules instead of just being in the moment.

    Distract yourself. When negative or anxious thoughts start rising, catch your self and STOP. Picture some relaxing scene or try to think of something else. Getting impatient won’t make things move along any faster, so why get worked up for nothing?

    Practice delaying gratification. Developing patience isn’t easy so don’t try to practice with your big goals in life. Start with small things. Practice waiting a few minutes before you eat that dessert that you so much want, or a couple of days before you go on that shopping spree, stop and think about it first. Maybe you don’t need or want any of them that badly after all. You can save yourself some money or added calories. If you decide you do, wait as much as you can before you give in.

    Practice, practice, practice. Developing patience is much like physical exercise because it gets easier with practice but you need first to develop the muscle and habit.

    Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragement and failure. Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success. As a Dutch proverb says “A handful of patience is worth more than a bushel of brains.”


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    4 comments to Patience? Easier said that put into practice

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